A while back I wrote a theatre version of Les The Punter and sent it to Manchester ADP who promised a script appraisal – and that is what popped up in my inbox today.
Here it is:
A few pub friends mourn the loss of Les a fellow pub punter and as a tribute bet on a horse that ends up winning. Only it’s not them who claim the winnings, but Les himself, risen from the dead.
I really liked this piece. At first I didn’t but the dialogue and general weirdness of it won me over.
The characters are funny, although I do feel there may be one too many. However, they’re memorable and the language is fun and has a lot of wit at times. It’s not always witty and there are a few times it feels stilted, so take another proof of it to sharpen it up.
I predicted the twist of the horse winning as will the audience, but I think we’re meant to as it means we don’t predict the final strange twist, which is a really imaginative ending.
I think the audience will really enjoy this. What is also nice is that it’s not a scene from a piece to be extended that’s masquerading as a short play. It works at the length it is and is memorable.
Well done, I look forward to seeing it staged.
Should the script be put forward for a reading at this time? Yes.
Next step? I’m going to give their suggestions a go and see how the script reads then but importantly, Les is now on file and awaiting a possible read through.
*October 2018 Update* I’ve re-jigged the script which now has one character less plus I’ve taken out the dialogue I think my reviewer was alluding to. It’s all far tighter and a copy has been sent to ADP.
About Manchester ADP.
Rather than me paraphrase, find out full details, first hand, here: www.manchesteradp.com